


After the Storm

by SadPrivilege



Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, Post ep 5, have fun, pricefield
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-28
Updated: 2015-11-28
Packaged: 2018-05-03 19:34:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5304062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SadPrivilege/pseuds/SadPrivilege
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>By God, she would do anything to know that Max still loved her, even after all the shit with the tornado. Of course Max was going to have trouble processing everything that had happened, who the hell wouldn’t? But Chloe worried what that would do to her mentally, psychologically. For a second, she opened her mouth, ready to say something, but no words came. The tense silence remained for another hour or so.</p>
            </blockquote>





	After the Storm

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, decided to write this as a parallel to the fluffiness that is my other post episode 5 fic. Also TRIGGER WARNING. THIS CHAPTER DEALS WITH DEPRESSION, SUICIDE, CUTTING, AND A BUNCH OF OTHER HELLA SERIOUS SHIT. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

The soft rumbling of the old engine soothed Max’s senses as they traveled through the serene Oregon countryside at a nice and slow pace. Neither she nor Chloe had said a word to each other since they booked out of the hotel almost sixteen hours ago. Hell, Max didn't even know if Chloe had any plans whatsoever. They just seemed to be driving aimlessly, day after day, until… what? Until they felt they could go back to Arcadia Bay? Until news of survivors broke? Until they got out of state? Out of country? Max curled up in a ball in her seat, her forehead resting against the seat window as they drove.

Every now and then, Chloe would glance over at Max, making sure she was okay. Her steady breathing relaxed Chloe a bit. As long as Max was okay, Chloe would be fine. She didn’t know what she would do without Max. Without her time traveling… girlfriend? Was that really the right word? At this point, Chloe would give anything and everything to know Max’s true feelings towards her…

At one point, Chloe tried intertwining her hand with Max’s, but the other woman had drawn her hand away quickly, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. Chloe had blushed, thankful that they were traveling in relative darkness. Yet, her heart was torn into a billion tiny fragments just by that small movement.

But by God, she would do anything to know that Max still loved her, even after all the shit with the tornado. Of course Max was going to have trouble processing everything that had happened, who the hell wouldn’t? But Chloe worried what that would do to her mentally, psychologically. For a second, she opened her mouth, ready to say something, but no words came. The tense silence remained for another hour or so.

* * *

 At 11:27 PM, Chloe pulled into a shitty motel’s parking lot, the neon sign barely illuminating the inside of the truck. There was a single strip of light that shone across Max’s face, and by _God_ did it make Chloe love her even more. Somehow, Max managed to be beautiful even when she was sad, a skill that Chloe only wished that she herself possessed.

“Max, are you okay? You haven’t said anything all day,” Chloe finally spoke, her voice incredibly hoarse, resting a gentle hand on the other woman’s shoulder. She simply shrugged, moving her head a little bit to glance at Chloe. “Talk to me. Please. I… I miss you…” _Ugh, I shouldn’t even fucking attempt mushy talk._ Even if Chloe thought that her words were clunky and stupid, Max turned to face her, and the look on her face hit Chloe like a brick. It was more than sad, bordering on depressed. In all her years of knowing Max, she had never had a look like this. The cheerful, bubbly girl that would make constant Star Wars references was gone, replaced by a mere shell, a husk, of a person, wrecked by a week of constant stress and horror. There were bags under her eyes, something Chloe wouldn’t even dream of seeing Max with, her lips chapped, and eyes red and puffy.

“Max…” Was all Chloe could say before she felt a lump in her throat, and her mouth go dry. Tears welled in her eyes, but she wiped at them furiously before they made their way down her cheeks.

“Did I do the right thing?” Max whispered, looking Chloe straight in the eyes. They locked eyes for a second, before Chloe looked at the dashboard just to the left. “Chloe, please. Tell me I made the right choice.” Was she… begging? Was Maxine Caulfield begging Chloe to tell her everything was okay?

“You… you made the right choice. Believe me, Max. I honest to God don’t think you’d… last long without me…” Chloe’s voice trailed off as Max stared out the window again, her eyes shut tight and head shaking vigorously.

“No, I let all those people die just for _you_. I’m selfish, I’m evil, I’m-I’m a monster…” She was sobbing, curled up in a ball in the passenger seat of the truck, seemingly trying to put as much distance between herself and Chloe as possible. Chloe retracted her hand, staring with wide eyes as Max broke down right in front of her, speaking in between racking sobs that tore Chloe’s heart into pieces.

“Joyce, Victoria, David, Dana, Brooke, they’re all dead! All because I wanted to keep my girlfriend alive for just one more fucking day! I’m not a fucking hero, I’m a maniac! I use this _gift_ to help myself, and _only_ myself! Life would’ve been so much fucking easier if you had just died in that fucking bathroom! Life would’ve been so much easier if _I_ had died in that bathroom! Why me, out of all the fucking people on earth? Why did the universe decide to pick some waif hipster chick to give time altering powers? Goddamn it, Chloe, _please_! Help me!” She was shouting, screaming, at the top of her lungs, as Chloe watched in horror while her girlfriend threw a tantrum. _What the fuck do I do?_ She had been depressed, hell, suicidal even, but she didn’t know what to do when someone else is depressed. What do you say, how do you comfort them without seeming like a condescending bitch? Max looked at Chloe again, and Chloe finally understood the extent of the situation.

There wasn’t anger in her eyes, nor sadness, not even regret. Just fear. Fear of what was to come, fear of the unknown. Chloe knew the look all too well. It was the same look she saw in her own eyes months ago. After Rachel disappeared.

“Maxine, calm down. Please,” Max’s eyes widened. Chloe never used her real name, unless she was about to do something drastic. “Have you ever looked closely at my arms? Like, _really_ closely?” She asked, reaching across her torso and rubbing her arm. Max shook her head, tilting her head a little bit. Taking a deep breath, Chloe lifted up her jacket sleeve a bit, to show Max more of her arm.

Almost the entirety of the underside of Chloe’s forearm was covered in scars. Thin, light, white bumps that chilled Max to her core. The thought of Chloe being this hopeless and lost… she took Chloe’s arm in her hand, gently tracing one of the scars. She shuddered a little, but otherwise let Max continue. There were scars all over her arm. Some looked very old, and some… some looked more recent. Maybe a few weeks old.

“Chloe, when…” She started, before trailing off as Chloe opened the glovebox with her free hand. After rummaging around for a bit, she pulled out a razor. _Oh my god…_

“I kept this in my pocket every day since Rachel lef-was killed… until you showed up again. That was the last time I took it out my pocket, and that’s when I put it in there. I was fine the first week. Then, I got worried. Worried that she had just up and left, but I always hoped she would come back. Fast forward two weeks, and I cut for the first time. I didn’t really like it, but I didn’t know what else to do. Then, you showed up. You saved me from myself. So please, _please_ , don’t be an idiot like I was. You can get through this, I _know_ you can. And I’ll be with you the whole way there, okay? I promise.” Chloe was surprised to find a tear rolling down her cheek after her little schpeel, which Max reached out to wipe away. The hand stayed rested on her cheek for almost a second longer, but that was all Chloe needed in order to understand Max’s feelings.

“I'll get us a room for the night. You see if there’s a Wal-Mart or something nearby, alright?” Chloe asked, trying to diffuse the mood. Max immediately wrenched her hand away from her cheek, blushing furiously but smiling nonetheless. Giggling at the woman’s shyness, Chloe planted a soft kiss on her forehead before getting out the car. Still blushing despite herself, Max pulled out her phone, searching for a grocery store of some kind nearby. They needed snacks, if they were going to survive on the road.

Knowing she was able to talk to Chloe about how she felt was nice, and the tension between them was obviously gone by now. And, the kiss Chloe gave her… did she really feel the same way about them being a couple as Max did? Whatever the case, Max found a K-Mart and Waffle House nearby, so that was tomorrow morning all planned. Just as Max put her phone away, Chloe emerged from inside the lobby, carrying room keys and whistling. She jerked her head to the side, a silent “get out” to Max.

“Did it go okay?” She asked, closing the car door softly. Chloe glanced behind her before answering. _What the hell? What's she looking for?_

“Guy at the counter was a total creep, but I just flashed my Lesbian Credit Card and he shut up.” Chloe answered, smiling easily. _So she's fine._   _But how can she smile like that when she showed me her cutting scars not even five minutes ago?_ Yet, Max laughed, punching her shoulder gently.

“Shut up. How much was the one night?”

“Fifteen bucks. We still have enough. Did you find a store?”

“There's a K-Mart just around the corner, and a Waffle House about five minutes away.”

“Sweet. Wanna head to the room?”

“Duh. I need some sleep…”

“Me too, Maxine. Me too.”


End file.
